A long while ago, I shared a video on Instagram talking about the concept of starting your day at any time.  How we are so easily coaxed into the mindset that if you aren’t getting up early, if you aren’t checking off a long to-do list every day, that you’re lazy and you can’t be successful.  But the reality is that not everyone is a morning person; being on the constant go isn’t healthy; that any step forward, no matter what time of day you do it, is still a step forward.

We’re taught to feel bad about “wasting a day.”  But really, any day spent doing what you feel you need, or doing things you enjoy, is never a wasted day.  Remember: Rest is productive.

Anyways, after I had posted that video – a friend reached out asking if I had any tips for correcting this mindset of feeling bad or like you’ve wasted a day if you don’t get up early.  After a couple weeks of reflecting on the question, this is what I shared with him:

1. Create a checklist of things you want to get done

   • Start w/just 3 goals

   • Create a secondary list for things that pop up so you don’t forget them

     •  This allows you to release the task from your mind so that you can keep your focus on the current task you’re actively trying to complete

     • Rather than framing them as goals or “things to do,” pose questions like:

       • What do I want to complete to ease some of my anxieties?

       • What can I do to help me feel better about today

       • What will make this day feel productive

   • This allows you to simplify the tasks, and actually create lists that help you.  Answers could look like “taking a bath” “cooking my fave meal”, or “completing that essay draft”

2. Write out 3 things you’re grateful for today.

   • Can be as small as:

     • Having leftovers in the fridge

     • Connecting with a friend online

     • The sun coming out

   • when you’re in a funky headspace, try to acknowledge it w/gratitude like:

     • Grateful I listened to my mind/body and allowed myself to stay in bed a little longer

     • For sitting w/the hard feelings that have come up today

     • For making the decision to get some things done this afternoon

3. Journal through your thoughts. That simple. (Sometimes through video journaling when writing doesn’t feel enough - especially helpful for those who live alone)

4. Taking time to breathe + sigh deeply + loudly to release negative feelings you’ve attached to the “need to be productive early.”

5. Ensure you’re following/consuming supportive content, so when the doomscrolling inevitably happens, you’re at least consuming mindful + supportive + uplifting content w/gentle reminders.

Ultimately, it’s a lot of battling w/yourself and learning to break down habits + mindsets that have become so deeply engrained into us. From where?? Who knows…

But learning to acknowledge the toxicity that comes with/a “forced production” mindset and learning to accept that all + any steps forward are good. Even if it means all you did was wake up and survive another day.

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I think learning to become more present and less judgmental of yourself is super key in all of this.  It’s hard, but such a necessary skill for learning to let go of harmful thoughts about yourself and others and gives you more space to support and encourage growth in a gentle and sustainable way. 

This can look like acknowledging you’ve been spending a lot of time scrolling online and taking a moment to pull the screen away and ask yourself “is this really what I want to be doing right now?”  And to be honest – it’s totally okay to say “yes,” so long as you acknowledge that you’re aware you’re doing it, and you’re not consistently using it as a way to avoid what you really need and feel.  Having this awareness is what allows you to be present and understanding of what you’re doing, why you’re doing it, and if you actually want to be doing it.  It’s making that conscious choice knowing that you also have the ability to choose something different.

I think also having the maturity and wisdom to understand that everyone functions differently contributes to shifting this mindset; the super early regimented routine a childless morning-person one person uses, won’t necessarily work for a single parent who hates mornings. This doesn’t mean one is more likely to be successful over the other, nor does it mean one can’t ever be successful.  It’s about learning from others, finding what works for you, and not letting the success of others define what success looks like in your life.

Stay passionate and curious,
Hunter 💛